Sweeter Times Two

Well...my heart is saddened to write this...we lost the baby. Which for us, now makes Heaven sweeter times two. I went in for my check up - so excited to hear the heartbeat, but was devastated not too. Greg was out of town, so my mom met me at the hospital to get my ultrasound that showed that the baby had died probably 7 weeks earlier. It was so overwhelming and felt like a slap in the face because we were sure everything was going well. The surgeon was at the hospital at that time getting ready to do a surgery, so they just sent me right up and got me prepared for surgery. After how horrible my experience was last time we didn't want to take any chances and I was having some sharp pain, so along with the fact that the baby had been gone for so long, we all agreed the D & C would be best. I was in shock for most of it seeing I was going in to hear a heartbeat and four hours later I was on a table having my baby taken from me. Greg arrived after they took me in, so it was such a comfort to finally see him when I awoken. I woke up in a panic and very upset, which caused my heart rate to go out of control and caused many nurses and the doctors to be concerned. The surgeon went and got Greg right away to come and help settle me down. It was so wonderful to have his arms around me and for us to finally grieve together, instead of over the phone. I could not have loved him more in that special moment. I had a little over an hour for recovery time, which was nice to spend with Greg and my parents while watching a little march maddness. They asked what I wanted to drink...water...sprite? Um - Coke, please...you can even tap that sweet nectar into the IV if that would be helpful! I felt somewhat okay, so i decided it was time to go. The boys were at home sleeping with Darin and Darcy watching them. Their plans changed with a two second phone call and for that I am very thankful. Thank You for taking care of our precious children, Holsopples! We arrived home to find that a friend had stocked our fridge and cupboards with food and left flowers and some money to help with medical bills. It was such an uplifting moment to walk in the door feel hopeless and depressed... then to see that my two boys whom God has given to me, were under such good care and love. Then to see my empty kitchen filled was a sweet moment of comfort that I was not going to have to walk this dreadful road alone. So thank you to all, for your cards, thoughts, prayers, meals, cleaning my house and doing laundry, toys for the boys, hugs and words of encouragement. We have been very blessed in this circumstance to see how much we are loved and the great support system we have. We are doing okay. We have our good and bad days but we rest in the fact that in our weakness, God makes us strong. To my angel baby...I love you so much. There will always be a piece of my heart that aches for you until we are reunited in my Heavenly Welcome. I can't wait to sing praises to my Lord while I hold you in my arms...I can already see it my head...you are beautiful and perfect...just like God's plan for you!